Flav Dismisses all Flavors; Proposes to Previous Baby Mama

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In his last reunion show on what he promised would be the final season of “Flavor of Love,” rap figure turned reality king Flavor Flav dismissed Thing 2, his choice in last week’s season finale — and every other woman from the past three seasons — by choosing instead somebody who was never on the show, a baby mama named Liz, who appeared with their curly headed son named Karma.

It had been six months since the “Flavor of Love 3″ finale, and he hadn’t seen his choice, Thing 2, in all that time. She came on and said she was excited for the future. But when Flav was asked if he was still in love, he came up with this tortured speech:

Let me tell you something, man. Out of all my shows that I’ve done, this moment right here is the hardest for me. This is my third season of ‘Flavor of Love,’ and everything, you know what I mean, and um, I went through 65 women — 65 — to try to, you, find love, you know what I’m saying? And at the time, too, when I, you know, started this, had a baby on the way and the whole nine, you know what I’m saying? But yet you know I wasn’t committed to his mom. I been away from her now for a good six months and everything, you know and um, I just spending a lot of time, you know what I’m saying, with my son — you know, I got Karma, I got a son, my seventh child. I’m spending a lot of time with him and everything you know what I mean. and also too I been spending a lot of time with his mom, too.

    You know, just after doing these three shows now, I mean maybe, you know, maybe I should have just been noticing what I had in my face the whole time, you know what I’m saying? There’s an old saying, you know: the best gift a man can ever give a child is to love his mother. And you know I do love his mom. That’s right now where I need to be, to keep the family together. .

Thing 2 took it well, saying they have a friendship for a long time to come.

And when the baby mama named Liz  (who didn’t even have a proper “Flavor of Love” nickname) came out with their son Karma, Flav got on his knee to do something he also didn’t do in three seasons of “Flavor of Love.” He proposed. He got on his knee to ask Liz:  ”Would you marry me?”

“Finally, finally,” replied the poor woman, with their son Karma on her lap; she’s had to watch five seasons of his romantic antics on various VH1 reality shows.

All host Lala could do was try to get him to promise to have their wedding televised. Just so we won’t lose Flav to domestic life altogether.

Story by Roger Catlin